Knit-a-little, Split-a-little

In an attempt to retain my gay card during the sports heavy fall, I’ve succumbed to the requests of some colleagues and joined the Neurotrans-Knitters. Yes, I know…that’s soooo gay! I myself have informed many a friend, upon hearing they knit, just how gay it really is.

Wanna know what’s even more gay? I was splitting wood yesterday afternoon (after having spent the previous 2 hours knitting and watching tennis) and a song popped into my head. I couldn’t resist singing it aloud for Mark…“Knit-a-little, split-a-little, knit-a-little, split-a-little, knit, knit, split” and he did…he split…he turned on a dime and walked away while muttering under his breath…”that is soooo gay”.

Between the knitting and creating new lyrics for old show tunes I should have a good year or two of watching sports and happily not listening to Madonna and Cher before I have to worry about my gay card again.

I’m just sayin’.


10 responses to “Knit-a-little, Split-a-little

  1. i thought the little song was ‘knit one, pearl one, pull it tight’ but i like the addition of the split. i remember the days of splitting wood to heat the house. call me crazy but i miss them.

  2. I knit a lace throw for my mother. It was fucking fabulous. I love to knit, and I LOVE being GAY.

  3. about time you redeemed yourself! now where is my jam? 😉

  4. You could de-gay it just a touch by keeping chewing tobacco in your mouth while knitting and changing the song to “knit a little, spit a little.”

    Okay, sorry. I’m leaving now.

  5. As long as you don’t take your knitting to bars like I used to see queens do in Austin; and I won’t judge you too harshly 😛

  6. You’re sooo bad Rodg!!

    Hey, could you knot me a pair of wool socks. I could actually use a pair. LOL. But seriously…

  7. LBL – Crazy? You won’t hear it from my lips…I love splitting wood and my wood stove. Nothing like it on a snowy night.

    Tater – I should have known…you are a true renaissance man. I learned to crochet as a kid but always wanted to knit. We seem to find more and more in common every time we post. Girl…we need to talk!

    Toeknee – Redeemed myself? You’re asking for my homemade jam…that alone adds many points to my gay card!! We really need to hook up SOON, I miss you!

    Helen – I see this taking place in the bathroom after splitting wood. Sitting on the toilet, chaw in jaw crooning…’split a little, shit a little, knit a little, spit a little’. Girl…we could be the next Comden & Green!

    Diamond – Rule #1…Don’t judge. Rule #2…bars are for drinking. Knit at home…at least until you’re making fabulous sweaters that sell for hundreds of dollars!

    Tony – How big are your feet? 😉

  8. I must now come out as a knitter. I actually used to teach knitting at one of the local yarn stores. And yes, all of my sweaters I made myself. (They’re pretty fucking fab too.) I have not split wood since I moved out of my parents house though. Don’t get me started. Which reminds me, I have to finish a pair of socks I have going. You and Helen are going to have to finish that musical.

  9. what is it with knitting of late? damn, everybody’s knitting. the clacking of those needles drives me absolutely wild. i’m a crochet girl myself.

    but splitting wood? ~ honey, you are some kind of rough & tough butch boy out there singing and splitting wood, whether you’re singing about knitting or not. ouch. hard work.

  10. what would be really so gay is if you did all of this in pumps.

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